Early decision. Early action. Acceptance rates. Letters of recommendation. We have all heard those words circling at school, at home, and in extracurricular activities. As soon as the new freshmen set foot in the Upper School, they are immediately surrounded by discussions of college and the future. Because of this emphasis on the college process, the focus of the high school experience is shifted to constantly looking ahead instead of appreciating the learning taking place in the present. The college preparation process must be restructured to reduce the intense stress and pressure that students feel throughout their Upper School years. 

It is no secret that the application process for college can be incredibly stressful and overwhelming. It’s as if the environment at the Upper School that students create makes them believe that every class, every decision, and seemingly every opportunity will affect their college application experience. For many students at the Upper School, this skewed belief causes them to lose sight of what is truly important. Students tend to overfocus on that one test that did not go as well as they had hoped, or their upcoming English essay, which they believe is important to their grade in the class. This behavior often creates a tense atmosphere concentrated on assignments and grades instead of the true learning experience. 

However, what students often forget is that the people around them have a significant impact in shaping their identities and supporting them. In 10 years, will you really remember that one math test that you didn’t do well on? Instead, I guarantee that you will remember the friends and people closest to you who were there for you and supported you during your toughest times. The close connections and trusting friendships and relationships built in high school allow us to become the best version of ourselves. 

Although applying for college can be time-consuming at times, many aspects of the process are rewarding and inspiring. As students, we are constantly faced with the question, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” Most of the time, we do not really know what we want to do. As a result of this uncertainty, it can become a sensitive topic for some. However, shifting our perspective on the college application process can allow us to learn about ourselves in ways we never expected. As students think about the type of school they want to attend, the location and the career they want to pursue, they begin to discover their passions, which is an impactful process that allows students to understand new aspects of themselves and who they are as students and people. 

So the next time you feel pressure about that one test or essay that you think will significantly impact your grade and consequently your college application process, remember that college does not define who you are as a student. It does not define you as a person. Instead, the people with whom you choose to surround yourself and form deep connections are the ones that will have the most profound impact on your life.